Are there days where your family relationships are in a daze?

As we begin the month of June, as a culture we are entering a time of the year that emphasizes family celebration. A few weeks ago, we celebrated Mother’s Day. In a few weeks, we will celebrate Father’s Day. And during the summer, families will often strive to take a family vacation and engage in other activities as families.

Yet so often, when we think about families, when we think about family relationships, we can find ourselves thinking of family days as family d.a.z.e. As parents, we can feel like we are walking through life dazed and confused by the actions of our children. As students transition to a new grade, to a new school, or to a new chapter of their lives, they can find themselves in a daze of fear and uncertainty. And as married couples, we can feel like we are walking though life dazed and confused as a result of unresolved conflict and unmet expectations in our relationships.

So at the church where I serve, during the next few weeks, we are going to spend our time together in a sermon series entitled family daze to family days. During this series, we are going to spend our time together looking at a section of a letter that a man named Paul wrote to an early church, called the Book of Ephesians. And it is in this letter that we see Paul explain to this church and to us here today, God’s desire and design for family relationships.

And as we go through this series, our hope and our prayer is that God would move by the power of the Holy Spirit in our heads, hearts, and hands to equip and empower us to move our families from a place of dazed conflict and confusion to a place where we would experience the family relationships that God has created and called us to experience. So this week we are going to jump into the book of Ephesians, beginning in Ephesians 5:15:

Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil. So then do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.

Paul begins this section of his letter by commanding the members of the church at Ephesus, and followers of Jesus throughout history, to “be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise”. If Paul was to make this command to us in the language we use in our culture today, this command would sound something like this: “carefully consider and take note about how you are conducting your life. Carefully consider how you are living your life”. 

Paul then makes a contrast between someone who conducts their life in an unwise manner as opposed to someone who conducts their life in a wise manner. When Paul refers to an unwise person, he is referring to a person who does not exercise the proper discernment or wisdom when it comes to how they live their lives. By contrast, a wise person here refers to someone who lives their life applying the understanding and wisdom that comes from God.

Paul here is basically saying to the members of the church at Ephesus “there is divine wisdom and understanding that is available to you, so make sure that you are living your life in a way that is exercising that divine wisdom and discernment.” Paul then provides the reason why they were to access and exercise this divine wisdom in verse 16. The phrase making the most of your time literally means to gain an advantage or opportunity.

In other words, followers of Jesus are to take every advantage and every opportunity to avoid what would be unwise. As followers of Jesus, we are to take advantage of every opportunity to live wisely because the days are evil.  The harsh reality is that life on earth is filled with plenty of activities and relationships that are morally and socially damaging and destructive.

I mean, it is not hard to get involved in relationships or activities that are unwise, is it? And as parents is that not one of our greatest fears when it comes to our children? And students, is that not one of your greatest fears when it comes to the relationships that you have with your friends?

And because of that reality, in verse 17, Paul commands the members of the church at Ephesus and followers of Jesus throughout history to “do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.” When Paul uses the word fool here, it refers to someone who lacks good judgment. This word also conveys the sense of disregarding reality. In the Bible, a fool is a person who knows something is true yet proceeds to live life as though it is not true. A fool is a person who says “I know the law of gravity is true” then proceeds to step off a ten-story building.

Instead of living life in a way that consistently disregards reality, Paul commands that we understand what the will of the Lord is. When you see the word will in our Bibles, most often this word refers to God’s desires for one’s life. You see, God has a desire for how He would like me to live my life in relationship with Him and one another. And God has a desire for how he would like you to live your life in relationship with Him and one another.

And as we will see in this series, God has a desire for how we are to live in our family relationships. The letters that make up the Bible clearly provide for us God’s desire and design for families and for family relationships. But before revealing God’s desire and design for family relationships, Paul makes a statement that reveals for us a timeless principle about relationships.

Tomorrow, we will look at that statement together...