Family Daze...

Last week, we spent our time together as a culture celebrating the influence and impact that our mothers have in our lives through mother’s day. And as we move into the middle of May, our culture tends to lean towards family celebrations. There is mother’s day. There are the graduation ceremonies of our children. Then there is Memorial Day, which tends in many ways to mark the beginning of summer family activities. And there is Father’s Day.

Yet so often, when we think about families, when we think about family relationships, we can find ourselves thinking of our family days as family d.a.z.e. As parents, we can feel like we are walking through life dazed and confused by the actions of our children. As students transition to a new grade, to a new school, or to a new chapter of their lives, they can find themselves in a daze of fear and uncertainty. And as married couples, we can feel like we are walking though life dazed and confused as a result of unresolved conflict and unmet expectations in our relationships.

So during the next few weeks, we are going to spend our time together looking at family relationships. Our hope and our prayer is that we would be able to move our families from a place of dazed conflict and confusion to a place where every member would experience the family relationships during their days on earth that God has created and called us to experience. So during these weeks, we are going to spend most of our time together looking at a section of a letter that a man named Paul wrote to an early church, called the Book of Ephesians. And it is in this letter that we see Paul explain to this church and to us here today, God’s desire and design for family relationships.

Before we look at this section of this letter that Paul wrote to the church at Ephesus, we first need to understand the context in which Paul’s wrote these comments. The first three chapters of the book of Ephesians describe all that God has done in order to bring us into the relationship with Him that we were created for. God the Father chose us and adopted us as His children; Jesus Christ rescued and redeemed us from our selfish rebellion and sin so that we could receive the forgiveness of our sin and enter into the relationship with God that we were created for. And as followers of Jesus, God gives us the Holy Spirit as a down payment and a seal that reveals the security that we have for all eternity.

Paul then begins Ephesians chapter four by imploring us, in light of all that God has done for us, to walk in a manner worthy of our calling. Paul then unpacks this statement throughout the remainder of his letter to this church about how our relationship with Christ should influence and impact our relationships with others. And it is in this context that we read the following in Ephesians 5:15:

Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil. So then do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.

Paul begins this section of his letter by commanding the members of the church at Ephesus, and us here today to “be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise”. If Paul was here this morning and was to give this command to us in the language and culture we use today, this command would sound something like this: “carefully consider and take note about how you are conducting your life. Carefully consider how you are living your life”. Paul then makes a contrast between someone who conducts their life in an unwise manner as opposed to someone who conducts their life in a wise manner. An unwise person here is the person who does not exercise the proper discernment or wisdom when it comes to how they live their lives. The wise person here refers to someone who lives their life applying the understanding and wisdom that comes from God. Paul’s point here is that there is divine wisdom and understanding that is available to you, so make sure that you are living your life in a way that is exercising that divine wisdom and discernment.

Paul then provides the reason why we are to access and exercise this divine wisdom in verse 16. The phrase making the most of your time literally means to gain an advantage or opportunity. In other words, followers of Jesus are to take every advantage and opportunity to avoid what would be unwise. We are to take advantage of every opportunity to live wisely because the days are evil. The harsh reality is that life on earth is filled with plenty of activities and relationships that are morally and socially damaging and destructive. I mean, it is not hard to get involved in relationships or activities that are unwise, is it? And as parents is that not one of our greatest fears when it comes to our children? And students, is that not one of your greatest fears when it comes to the relationships that you have with your friends?

So, in verse 17, because of the timeless danger of relationships and activities that are damaging and destructive, Paul commands the members of the church at Ephesus and us here today to “do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.” When Paul uses the word fool here, it refers to someone who lacks good judgment. This word also conveys the sense of disregarding reality. In the Bible, a fool is a person who knows something is true, yet proceeds to live life as though it is not true. A fool is a person who says “I know the law of gravity is true” then proceeds to step off a ten story building.

Instead of living life in a way that consistently disregards reality, Paul states that we are to understand what the will of the Lord is. When you see the word will in our Bibles, most often this word refers to God’s desires for our lives. This morning, God has a desire for how he would like me to live my life in relationship with Him and one another. And God has a desire for how he would like you to live your life in relationship with Him and one another. And as we will see in the upcoming weeks, God has a desire for how we are to live in our family relationships. The Bible clearly provides for us God’s desire and design for families and for family relationships.

But before revealing God’s desire and design for family relationships, Paul makes a statement that reveals for us a timeless principle about relationships. Tomorrow, we discover this timeless principle.

So, do you carefully consider how you are living your life? Do you live your life in a way that disregards reality, or that leans into the wisdom and discernment that God provides.